Chapter Six: When Decisions Make People

So, we’ve reached 2006. I had come home from Basic Training incomplete because I had injured my feet too many times. I was written to return to BCT the following summer to begin at week 8 (So you know, I flunked the written). While I was awaiting a doctor’s release to return to training, I was placed as a leader of the RSP in my unit (They told me these were the new enlistees who had yet to attend BCT themselves, and I was supposed to help prepare them for training. But honestly, it could be a military reject platoon, I never really looked it up)

After returning from training in August 2006, I tried to return to normal routine of going to school, and recovering my position as a cashier at Winn-Dixie, as I had been on an approved leave of absence throughout the summer. However, they did what they had to in order to have me permanently removed from the schedule. My mother insisted that I get a job with Grim, but I refused because I didn’t like the idea of our professional lives mingling with our private lives. Sadly, though, this decision did not protect our relationship from my terrible impulse lack-of-decisions.

For my 18th birthday, I was able to spend the day before, and the day of, my birthday with Grim at his house. Generally, when I hung out there, we would hang out in his brother’s room as they took turns playing a game on the computer. I was always on the bed, watching the game (honestly, there was nowhere else to sit. The room had a desk, a bed, a dresser and a cat) and on that night, Grim and I fell asleep on his brother’s bed. As far as I knew, his brother was kind enough to just take the other room. However, I woke up just before midnight to the feeling of kisses on my shoulder (My weakness!) and I initially thought it was Grim kissing me as he was about to go to work. But a hand trailed across my back and I could tell by the touch, the feel of the skin, and the kisses that it was NOT Grim – but his brother. (Yes, I am THAT detailed about knowing my partner. No, it’s not stalking, it’s Attentive Admiration, thank you very much) Grim was at work. I had no idea what to do.

“What will he think of me?” I kept asking him, “We shouldn’t be doing this!”

But I had no idea how to stop him without being rude (uhm, it’s called “No”, stupid) Eventually, curiosity overpowered fidelity, and I slept with the brother of my high school sweetheart in the wee hours of the morning on my 18th birthday. (And later fell in love with him, but that’s another chapter entirely that I won’t get into here.)

And that was where he found me sleeping the following morning. (I had never felt so blatantly stupid in my entire life, and I’m pretty sure my face compensated the feeling)

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